false alarm. still invincible.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
That accounts for only three of the penises
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
you made out with another girl for some wings
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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