it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
He kissed a someone with a penis
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Randomize
