We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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