I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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