She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
This is the high leading the old right now
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
