This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
