member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
