I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
