Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize