also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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