this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
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only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize