I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
