We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
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