i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
