this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize