My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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