I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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