it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
