There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
