"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
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