he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
