took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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