I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
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