belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
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