What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
