It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
wow bdsm is so cute
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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