Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
