she was so not down for the gang bang
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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