I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
