uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize