my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Randomize
