so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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