what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
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