You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
