Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Randomize
