I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
