Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize