Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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