I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
