You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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