so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
