I can't breathe out the right side of my face
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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