we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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