idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
