do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
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