I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
