Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize