he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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