Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Even my vagina gasped.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize