I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
